20050907

dont bother to ask me why im up so late.
dont bother to ask me why im blogging at this time.

maths lesson was errr, as usual boring.
and hmp was errrrr.
ohkay its a masterclass.
and im quite shocked at how this PIANIST person can point out every detail of a piece..
hmmm
is that supposed to be good or bad.
i mean, pointing out every single detail.
the dynamics, the cantabile, etc..
how every single note should be played.
and me being like only 12+ years old, (its not my birthday YET)
my attention span isnt veh long.
ahhaha.
so naturally i was errrr, bored.
not tha bored though,
i was appreciating the lovely music they played.
i loved EVERY SINGLE piece performed
and i think the pieces were WONDERFUL.

i esp think that my angel tiffany is reaallyyy pro.
i mean, i could see her fingers lo
and the whole piece was damn fast la.
even that pianist (i forgot her name) said that she was really good.
yes yes (:

oh and i sat down at the piano frustrated with myself this afternoon.
HORRIBLE PLAYING OF MY PIANO PIECES.
i mean, MY EXAM IS LIKE 9 DAYS AWAY?!
what the hell is the prob with me la.
im playing like shit.
my A1 is like crap DAMN MESSY;
my B1 is like mistakes here and there, soft notes may even NOT BE HEARD;
C1 is crap because i keep hitting the rong notes.

i am utterly disappointed with myself.

im going into that exam room and coming out of the exam sure to fail.
BOOHOOHOO.

yes and the 2 hours at the piano continuously trying to correct my mistakes were not much good.
even though i must say (guiltily) that this time that i practised was the one that i have put in my best effort.
that i tried very hard to correct those mistakes..
i am very hopeful of getting at least a 120/150 for that piano exam.
is it too late to try harder?
hmmmmm.
maybe i only have myself to blame.
i am too slack.

I MUST BUCK UP.
PULL UP THOSE SOCKS
AND STOP SLACKING.

and can i bring myself to love u again,
i really dont know..
i came across something that i saw on a particular website that made me really confused.
i shall not elaborate further.

i dont know if im supposed to bring myself to learn to trust u, believe u,
all over again.
and will i even get the hurt i got before in return?

oh well,
im going iceskating again to practise tml.
and im sure im gonna be knocked like crazy.
nevermind those silly banging ppl are the ones who will suffer losses.
i was trained to get up or fall on the ice without getting hurt.
go figure. x))

i better go sleep before i get poked tml morning.
or rather tml noon time.
wahahahah TATAS.